Excuse me, it's Mr Midgley to you

Jun 24 2003 By Bill Midgley, The Journal

As is no doubt the case with many people in the business world, I receive a great deal of unsolicited post, and I am intrigued by the way in which companies who send out such correspondence address their recipients.

Similarly, I am also surprised by the way in which forenames are used in face-to-face communication, particularly by individuals who I have never met before.

Correspondence is often received using my full name - in fact, both forenames and surname on occasions - which hardly impresses if the organisation is trying to establish its credibility.

It may be easier in this world of mass mailings to produce full names rather than the more acceptable formal address, but it does little for the reputation of the company if it cannot take a little more time and trouble to present itself in a way which will create that good impression.

I suppose at my age spelling mistakes in my name ought to be something to which I am quite used to, although an inability of a company to spell it correctly hardly does a great deal to establish that first bond. This inevitably leaves an impression of sloppiness.

Whilst much of the correspondence to which I refer is considered as no more than a "door opener", that way of entry will have been firmly closed unless companies pay more attention to the way in which they make that initial approach.

And the impersonality of what we receive may be one of the reasons why so much junk mail is considered to be exactly that.

We also appear to be following the American system with the use of first names, and it is quite common these days to be addressed in that manner, by receptionists or indeed any individual whom I do not know or are meeting for the first time.

I must confess to being a little old fashioned in this respect, but I was always brought up on the basis that using the surname was appropriate until told otherwise.

That may sound a little starchy in the 21st Century, but nevertheless it is still what many people expect, and is perhaps a form of respect to which we should all be entitled, reserving a little of our personal space.

A delightful lady, no longer with us, used to recount the story of how she was particularly annoyed by the way in which a number of people used her first name, particularly hospitals and doctors' receptionists. Following a burglary at her home a young police constable had the temerity to address her in that manner. Standing on her dignity she then advised the unfortunate constable that he would normally have had to address her as Mrs Justice M, which no doubt destroyed the confidence of the officer concerned, but made a very important and no doubt never to be forgotten point.

Companies tend to dehumanise us. The mode of address used in what ever form of communication reflects upon the reputation and thoroughness of businesses.

If an individual wishes to be referred to as Mr, Mrs, or even Ms, then I will respect that and will expect others to do the same.

Businesses which do not take the trouble to act in a similar manner are not those with whom I would wish to establish a relationship.

Attention to detail and a little more time spent in research and getting it right, produces far more effective results than through what may be seen as a sloppy and perhaps over-familiar approach.